My first thought was “Oh, Tommy Hilfiger’s a VERY equal opportunities employee. Hiring all those hearing-impaired kids. Good on them”.

On closer inspection, it turns out that they’ve all got these dinky little walky-talky things with a Secret Service-type gizmo stuck in their ears

Not deaf at all, in fact.

I guess it’s pretty useful if you’re protecting the President, but in a broom closet-sized store in the Carlsbad outlet mall…?

To the embarrassment of the retinue, I inquired with one of the children masquerading as staff as to their (the headset’s) usefulness.

“Well, some of us are here and some are out back, so we have to be in contact all the time….?”

Valley Girl semi question mark at the end.

“Ah” I said “Just in case you get lost”

“Yeah, and we have to call the manager sometimes, cause there are some things that we can’t do….?”.

“Like sell alcohol and stuff?”

Moon-faced look. Slack-jawed, too.

I can’t help it….