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This story is just too silly for words, but I’ll write about it anyway.

And it would be quite funny – despite its numbing lack of logic and common sense – if it hadn’t cost me money.

We’re flying around the world in business class.

Except on Air New Zealand.

Air New Zealand doesn’t have Business Class on its regional services, so it’s grin and bear it for 1:20 from Auckland to Nelson.

Business class travel reeks of generosity. Big, wide seats with lots of legroom, decent food, bottomless bottles and plenty of luggage allowance.

We travel fairly light, so we’ve got just over 40kg between the two of us, way below the allowance of 60kg on the way down via Bangkok and the allowance back via Los Angeles is more than I weigh.

So we’re in Auckland and it’s a smallish aircraft to Nelson so I check in the carry-on trolley, too.

7 kg.

49kg all told.

“That’ll be $45” she chirps.

Blank look.

“You’re 9kg overweight and that’s $5 a kilo”

Tell her we’ve just flown in Business Class on Thai, Air NZ’s Star Alliance partner, that Air New Zealand doesn’t even HAVE Business Class on this route, that we’re flying out via Los Angeles with about a 1000kg of allowance and that 7 of the 9kgs is international carry-on.

And that the Air New Zealand people in Nelson apply common sense and don’t charge if you’re connecting internationally to the States.

“Well, they might be more flexible in Nelson, but we charge full”

And then we get to Nelson and see this sign that says…yes, 20kg per person EXCEPT if your ticket involves travel to or via the USA.

No, it’s not “flexibility”, dearie.

The people in Nelson just know their product…..

I just wish Rob Fyfe, Air New Zealand’s clued-up CEO would read this.

Maybe he will.

He definitely needs to…..