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There used to be a schonky program on German TV called "Rivals of the Racetrack" about family feuding between a bunch of horsey upper class toffs in northern Germany.

This is my rival of the racetrack here (the corridor down to the HNO Clinic and back) – Hans Ludwig, my roommate.

He's pretty experienced in this sort of stuff – he had his other hip done last year and a knee's up for renewal too at some stage.

As soon as one of us gets ahead by a round, it's up on your crutches, into the starting gates and off towards the finishing post.

Down to 70 seconds today.

Should break the Sound Barrier by the weekend…….