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.. between the military (that’s where you get command of millions worth of kit and 50 men in your early 20s) and the Real World (where you THINK you have some sort of authority, but it’s a mere illusion).

Excerpts for Royal Navy performance reviews.

(Would I have loved to have used some of them on people who worked for me at various times….)

His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.

I would not breed from this officer.He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire  satisfaction.

He would be out of his depth in a car park puddle.

This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
 
This medical officer has used my ship to carry his genitals from port to port, and my officers to carry him from bar to bar.
 
Since my last report he has reached rock bottom, and has started to dig.
 
She sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
 
He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age.
 
Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
 
This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.