This is how it works: find someone/s in a previous Greek government with a high degree of dodginess, bung them unmercifully to ramp up the purchase price (the more they spend, the more bung they get…) and all of a sudden, their pockets are full, you’ve got the contract, you get a whacking great bonus and hey – it’s all tax-deductible.

In the meantime, Greece has more armour than they can park without the whole country sinking on one side and a massive debt load that they can’t repay, because all they have to pay with are fucking olives….

Thank goodness for Private Eye