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MIRRORCILLIN – A 5cc dose enables a woman to walk past mirrors for up to
four hours without pausing once.

STOPPANAGGIN – Gives women a vague feeling of contentment towards their
spouse/boyfriend.

COSMOPOLIRA – Doubles female intelligence, allowing “facts” in trash
lifestyle magazines to be disputed.

LOGICON – Trials showed that females taking this were able to follow a
proposition through to its logical conclusion, and argue effectively
without being diverted into non-relevant postulates such as “you don’t
love me any more”.

PARKATRON – 72% of women taking this were able to safely reverse park a
Ford Fiesta into a space only 12 metres long; 54% achieved this in under
15 minutes.

MAGNATACK – Uniquely distorts the cornea, making certain shapes appear
much larger than in reality – no practical use for this drug has yet been
found.

WARDROBIA – Clinical trials show that almost 23% of women taking this drug
can safely walk past a sale notice, and an amazing 42% stayed within their
credit limit.

BEERINTULIN – Engenders a female desire to bring her spouse/boyfriend
alcoholic beverages and snacks during televised sports.