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ESRI, a GIS software outfit has worked out what would happen if the world were to stop spinning.

Apart from the fact that half the world would be night and you’d be stuck with whichever season you were in at the time, the oceans would be drawn to the equator and would disappear polewards.

Which is good for BP, of course.

All of their off-shore wells are suddenly on-shore.

But if you have ocean-front property in Malibu, you’re stuffed – it’ll take you a good couple of hours to dip your toes into whichever ocean it is now.

You can drive to Hawaii, though…