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I imagine that summer’s the best time to sell camping equipment, but I couldn’t believe the price reductions at the local specialist the other day.
Mentioned it to the salesman.
“Ah” he said “This Now (pedantic buggers..) is the winter of our discount tents…”
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One of the local kids turned up the other week, looking for sponsorship for a run they were doing at school.
Asked him how many laps he reckoned he’d be able to do within the assigned time.
“2, maybe 2 and a half. I did 1 and 3/4 last week”
So I commited to €10 a lap.
Silly me.
Turns up this afternoon, so I said ” Guess you want €20, then”
“No. Fifty.”
“Eh?” I said “FIFTY? You reckoned you’d manage 2 laps…..”
“Well, I did 5” he said
I’ve got 2 weeks to pay up.
Don’t think me mean or anything, but if anyone’s reading this, they needn’t knock on MY door looking for sponsorship again.
Ever.
At least Dick Turpin wore a mask….
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The Funk Brothers played on more number-one records than The Beatles, Elvis, The Rolling Stones and The Beach Boys combined.
They were Motown’s studio band.
Joan Osborne – “Heatwave” from the movie.
Buy it.
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Stunningly good is the New Zealand Green Party’s advertising for the upcoming election.
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“THE Clintons wanted their pictures taken with him. His backers include George Soros, Michael Jordan and Christie Hefner. Flattering articles have appeared in places ranging from Washington, DC, to east Africa. Money pours into his campaign. Used copies of his autobiography sell for $50 apiece on the internet. Meet Barack Obama, who looks like being the first black male Democrat in America’s Senate.
The Economist first came across Mr Obama last winter in a basement where he was surrounded by law students drinking beer from plastic cups. Now throngs of Chicago’s finest queue up to hear him talk about foreign policy, and he is feted at pricey Democratic fund-raising meetings from coast to coast. As if to confirm that he is the next big thing in American politics he has just been asked to give a keynote speech at the Democratic convention.”
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Mrs jb has had a penfriend in India for the last mumble mumble years.
Since they were teenagers, anyway.
A loooooong time ago….
Meher (being even older than me and retired a lady of leisure for even longer) has very little to do.
She spends most of her day bombarding Ms jb and sundry others (even me on occasion) with pearls of wisdom in the form of witty sayings, appallingly bad jokes and dubious cartoons.
This one makes it all worth while, though
Those devious Japanese have taken to printing images of er… bums… on the actual garment.
Talk about sexy bums guaranteed…..
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“I was only smoking on the balcony” she said “and then the cat comes shooting right past me”
She’s crying, hyperventilating and smoking at the same time.
Which is understandable, because her apartment’s on the 7th floor and the ex-feline passed her on the way down from the 17th..
Well, it DOES say on the packet that smoking kills”, said Mrs jb under her breath.
The Boys crease up with laughter, which doesn’t actually add to the piousness of the situation.
So Christoph heads off downstairs with his shovel, retrieves the ex-feline – “All in one piece” he says – and provides it with temporary storage in the garbage room “just in case they want to have a funeral”.
It’s trash collection day on Thursday anyway” he says ” so it can go out then..”
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A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands their money.
Then turns to a customer and asks, ‘Did you see me rob this bank?’
The man replied, ‘Yes sir, I did.’
The robber shoots him on the spot, killing him instantly.
Turns to a couple standing next to him and asks the man ‘Did you see me rob this bank?’
‘No sir, I didn’t, but my wife did.’
Reminds me of Steve Fullmer’s story about shopping for a bow tie in a store in California (the mere fact that he claims to have shopped for a bow tie at ANY time in his life makes is sound suspiciously fictional…) and witnessing a fellow shopper attempting to robbing the store.
The store clerk promptly panicked, vomited and fainted, pretty much excluding a successful outcome of the attempted robbery.
“I couldn’t bring myself to give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, though” said Steve…..
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Couric: You’ve said, quote, “John McCain will reform the way Wall Street does business.” Other than supporting stricter regulations of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac two years ago, can you give us any more example of his leading the charge for more oversight?
Palin: I think that the example that you just cited, with his warnings two years ago about Fannie and Freddie – that, that’s paramount. That’s more than a heck of a lot of other senators and representatives did for us.
Couric: But he’s been in Congress for 26 years. He’s been chairman of the powerful Commerce Committee. And he has almost always sided with less regulation, not more.
Palin: He’s also known as the maverick though, taking shots from his own party, and certainly taking shots from the other party. Trying to get people to understand what he’s been talking about – the need to reform government.
Couric: But can you give me any other concrete examples? Because I know you’ve said Barack Obama is a lot of talk and no action. Can you give me any other examples in his 26 years of John McCain truly taking a stand on this?
Palin: I can give you examples of things that John McCain has done, that has shown his foresight, his pragmatism, and his leadership abilities. And that is what America needs today.
Couric: I’m just going to ask you one more time – not to belabor the point. Specific examples in his 26 years of pushing for more regulation.
Palin: I’ll try to find you some and I’ll bring them to you.
Except it was
I am seriously frightened
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